BlogAdda has started this wonderful activity on my most favorite topic- LOVE. So how can I, who goes by the name Aphrodite, refrain from not writing about it. Ha! Unthinakble.
As someone who has fed herself upon immeasurable and heavy doses of opium-like-romance for nearly two decades now (okay, I admit, perhaps a decade and a half!), thinking about that perfect soulmate only comes naturally.
When young, we all have these superficial, crazy notions about how we want our partner to be. Only some of us, I feel, are mature to think otherwise. But our needs and perceptions, the way we look at people, the way we bond with them, the things and qualities that we admire in others, undergo a radical change as we mature and grow up.
So as an adult in her mid-20s, I have to say this to my future knight in shining armor, wherever he may be (and how I wish he was reading this post! Gosh, fantasies you see, again bred on those romantic novellas and movies!). Though you might not be able to compete with the super hotness and cuteness that Ranveer Singh is a mixture of (no issues there at all, but learning a lesson or two from him might just help 😉 See here ), at least try.
Just kidding. On a very serious note, I feel that what a woman really wants from her partner is extremely simple, easily counted on fingers. It’s just that our popular culture has ridiculed it to heights when it portrays a woman’s demands as never ending. I still remember Deepika Padukone saying on a television show that all that a woman wants is love. Touché DP. Love is just the basic need that we start from.
Coming to the kasams that I want from my partner, whenever I may find him, would consist of the following.
The first and foremost requirement for me, which precedes anything and everything, is your RESPECT for all women. In much simpler and basic words, do not be the jerk who gives me sexist arguments, even in the slightest degree. It is totally unacceptable and non-negotiable. No argument, mind you, NO argument can be good enough to justify your sexism. You might be the best in every other department, but if you cannot fulfill this one basic need, you are a strict no for me. Just make a vow to respect women (and fulfill i too!) and I am half yours.
And now comes the turn of that kasam of unconditional love that I need from my partner, his promise to love me, no matter what. Not judging me for anything but try to understand why I am the way I am, why I would have reacted to a particular situation in the way I did. I will be wrong some times, no doubt, but to judge me or misunderstand me would be a cause for trouble between us.
Third, do NOT ever compare me with ANYBODY else, be it for better or worse. I abhor it. I have my own set of weaknesses and strengths, as does everyone else and by comparing me with somebody else, you will not be respecting my individuality, not loving me for the person that I am.
Fourth, just have faith in me, always. There will be times when I might just lose my confidence. And it is at these precise times that I would look towards you for support and comfort, not because I am dependent on you or because I am weak, but because love for me means encouraging each other when either of us is going through a rough phase.
I really do not expect any big gestures from you because love comprises of the small, little things that we do for each other. And that is basically why I want you to contribute equally in all the housework because if you do, you will never hear me complaint that you don’t express your feelings for me, which I know you men are incapable of.
This (kind of) poem that I wrote way back in college succinctly sums up what I have been wanting to say:
Loving you was never an option, but it happened I don’t know how,
I promise to remain trapped in your love if you take a vow.
Love me even when the world ceases to,
Be with me even when I no longer want you to,
Try to understand me, which at times, may be complicated,
Don’t let your trust wander ‘cause that’s the pillar of our bond.
Pamper me like your child sometimes,
Don’t leave ‘cause life with you seems divine,
Let your eyes see only me, never giving even a glance to anyone else,
Continue loving me in a world where only beauty sells.
I may not be as b’ful as others are, but it shouldn’t matter,
Loving you has happened, and retreating is beyond my power.
Loving me isn’t really difficult, trust me. it’s the simplest it can be. So don’t be scared by the above mentioned requirements (*wink wink*) because the things I listed are, I think, the universal needs of any woman. There might be some changes here and there but broadly, they remain the same.
Love is a beautiful feeling only when accompanied with trust and respect. This quote (found it on the internet one fine day) beautifully concludes my train of thoughts:
“There will be times in your life when you have to choose between being loved and being respected. Always pick being respected, that love without respect is always fleeting” but that respect could grow into real, lasting love.”